Messy Relationships, Blog 14: Humility and Hospitality
“You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment. And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself.”
- Matthew 22:37-39
In the gospel of Matthew above, and repeated in Mark 12:28-31, Jesus gives us the Great Commandments. He tells us we are to love 3 things - God, others, and ourselves. It is in fulfilling this charge that we are both able to, and in fact obliged to, act in humility and show hospitality towards others.
Any humility in my life is only a result of my being in right relation to God, which is understanding who He is and who I am in His eyes. How do we get to that place you ask?
Because I am still a sinner, I need to be reminded daily (at least), so I start every day by reading the Bible and praying. I do this because I love God and want to deepen my relationship with Him. This habit puts me in a place where I start my day with an attitude of humility, not thinking less of myself, but thinking more about God and what He desires for my life rather than what I want. As John the Baptist said, “He must increase, but I must decrease” (John 3:30). As He increases in my life I naturally decrease, assuming a humble posture.
With this humble posture and with great help from the Holy Spirit, I am then able to love others and love myself. Loving myself is about being comfortable that God loves me the way I am. I don’t deserve that, but He loves me just the same. I then can try to love others as I love myself (the way God loves me). It is taking the focus off me and looking to place it on others. It is asking about how they are doing, what they are thinking, how I can pray for them or be a help to them. It is encouraging them in what they are doing and accepting them for who they are and for their talents rather than judging them for what they are not.
When I can act from a place of humility and love others as God loves me, showing hospitality to others is a natural result. I won’t say that I am inviting strangers into my home, but I am inviting friends, and my wife and I truly enjoy cooking for others and entertaining. We also enjoy hosting pre-marital couples who start out as strangers to us. I try to be welcoming to others at church, in my work life, and always, and I believe there is hospitality in making others feel welcome by engaging with them.
John said, “They will know us by our love” (John 13:35), and that shines through as we fulfill the great commandments in humility and with hospitality.
Paul Collins, Elder